Inequalities versus Crawfords Crackers, 14th January, 1998

The most amazing finish to the game I've ever seen. We lost the first two ends and were only 8 down (bazza scored 42 inc. a 14 but this was offset against an appalling 18 from Diki). Tim was bowling well, but had only notched up 19 in the first 5 ups, but Dave G was scorching so that the last pair were level coming into the last up. Still 8 down in the game though. Looked like it was either gonna be 12-0 or 10-2 defeat. Then Barnes picked off a beautiful 9 (front pin - left vicar - right vicar). Dave G comes up to the stand. Four down with his first go. Next ball just misses the target. Final ball is millimetre perfect and takes down the remaining 5. Two nines in the last up and suddenly the pressure is on. She scores a 5. This means the last guy has no chance of winning the pair, needs 4 to draw and 5 to win. The first two go down Auntie Ackroyd !!! (It claimed a lot of victims last night). With his final ball he gets wood but only three go down. And we win !!!!!!!! 8-4 to us.

Roger Ackroyd gives seminar at Bristol

Yes - I actually saw him. We're talking about Roger Ackroyd of `The Gap'.

Inequalities versus Glassblowers, 23rd January, 1998

On the back the thrilling last-end come backs of the previous two matches comes another classic to tell the children about. Against the might of the Glassblowers -- a team we have traditionally done well against -- we came up trumps with yet another outstanding display of guile and nerve from our resident last-ender Timmy B. This time the game was put under pressure from a low scoring Diki P, only scoring 4 on his last up, when 6 or 7 would surely have been in order. Barnes, not thinking about the game, calmly steps up and beautifully knocks down 4 with his last ball to get 7 on the up. It was enough to draw the end and win the game by one. 9-3 to us. Had Barnes scored 1 less, we'd have lost 5-7 and two less and we'd have lost 2-10 (One more and we'd have won 10-2). Class.

Inequalities versus Lifers, 15th October, 2003

Utter confusion at the end of this classic. After the last ball had been bowled, we were resigned to a 4-8 defeat at the hands of the Lifers. Three minutes later, having skillfully remastered the ancient art of adding up, we'd first won 7-5 and then discovered it was actaully 10-2. So what actually happened ? Down by 11 into the last end, and although Mason and Barnes weren't firing on all cylinders, they'd picked up 6 points on their opponents. Last end and Mason hits an 8 and Barnes picks up a 7 and suddenly it's all there to play for. First ball from them down Auntie Ackroyd, and he picks up 4. Meanwhile, Barnes and Porter were busy trying to work out how much the last guy needed. Porter decided they needed 6 to win and signalled to the stickers-uppers, Hogg and Williams. The other team took this signal as gospel and informed Beardy that 6 was all that was needed. Beardy hits a 4 off his first, 2 off his second (to cheers from the Lifers and groans from the Inequals) and misses with his last. Beardy then adds up the team total (we'd already totted-up to 181) and came up with 181. Suddenly it's a draw !! Beardy isn't happy, and blames his team for misinforming him of the target. Then Hogg, fresh from sticking up, casts his eye over the score card and realises he's added 25 and 29 to give a pair score of 53 and not 54. So our total is 182 and we win the game 10-2. The Lifers captain accepted this version, although Beardy was not at all happy.

Of course, the irony is that it was Beardy who'd previously had a run in with MDP over an incorrectly-registered score.

Inequalities versus Bolts, 1st December, 2004

What a match last night. I reckon this one will go down in history as the best match ever. It was amazing. Here's what happened:

This weeks match was against the Bolts, a team we've beaten and lost too on several occasions in the past.

First up Matt & Burbs. Matt made a solid start and Burbs a slow start but both finished well with a pair of eights finishing with 61 for the pair. On the other side we had the bolts knocking the pins all over the place. One guy got 43 and the other 33. 15 down after first pair.

Second up Jas and Huw, a steady pair from these two boys, Huw scoring well again, definitely the most consistent player this year, they finished with a pair score of 65. Again on the other side a 43 from John Skinner and a 34 from the other guy meant we were 27 down after 2 pairs. Game over we thought, well not quite...

Last pair Boyo and Darren decided to just go for it from the start. Boyo started wildly with a four and Darren started with a steady 7. The Bolts only managed a 1 and a 3, 20 down with 5 to play.

Next up Boyo is wild again, only scoring 2 and letting the team down, Darren bags a solid 8. The Bolts only manage 8 on that end. 18 down with four to play. Boyo decides that he needs to concentrate harder....

Next end a 6 from Boyo and a 5 from Darren, again the Bolts drop some points, they only score 10. 17 down with three to play. At this point we thought we'd missed our chance, Boyo kept on "If only my fcuking 4 and 2 were 6's we'd only be eleven down" etc.

Next up Boyo gets 7, Darren 6. The bolts get 9. 13 down, 2 ends to play. This is where the game started to turn.

On the next end both Boyo and Darren were unlucky not to both get 9's, they ended up with a pair of 8's, very good bowling. At this point we could see that the Bolts were bottling it. They only manage to score 9 again. 6 down with one end to play. We were now thinking that the impossible could happen.

Last end Boyo gets a 6 and Darren a 7 to finish with a brilliant 41, this left the Bolts needing 8 for victory. First guy steps up, he only manages 3, 5 needed from the last guy. The Bolts are now looking very nervous and we start chirping a little. Last man up: MOP HEAD, he misses comfortably with the first 2, we couldn't believe it, he needed 5 with his last. He steps up with his last, throws it down, hits the middle pin and only gets 2, a victory by 2 pins to the Inequalities. We come from 27 down to win by 2, must be a record. In the end a 8-4 victory, marvellous.

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